Random Venting

True to my former blogging patterns, it has been about six months since my last entry. So it is time to catch up the two or three individuals that read our blog on the happenings of our life.

Well things are going really well. We are both just working on school and trying to make it through this semester. This semester has been quite a bit more difficult for both of us. We are on almost completely opposite schedules so with the exception of two or three hours before bed and the one class that we have together, Cameron and I don't get to see each other very often. The classes we are taking have also been more difficult. Cameron is taking a couple of pre-med (that's right PRE-MED) classes. He has Human Anatomy, Human Physiology, and Sports Nutrition, all of which are extremely difficult. I personally think that he is crazy, but he loves it.

My classes aren't particularly hard, they are just LONG and time consuming. On Tuesdays and Thursdays I am in class from 8:30 a.m. to 7 p.m. for three classes, each of them is 3 hours each. But I am enjoying everything except my drawing class, and I am doing well in everything.

Let me just pause here for some random venting. Going back to school was probably the hardest decision I have EVER made. For one, I had spent a lot of time in a major that I didn't really want to do before, so I knew that coming back to SUU would be really difficult simply for the fact that all of those that knew me during my "slacker" days would judge. For two, I am almost 30 and won't graduate until I am close to 33, and because of that I knew that people would be cruel and insensitive.

Knowing this has not made it any easier. It seems like every where I go some one has an opinion on the "old woman" going back to school, or on the fact that I am getting a degree in Photography when there are so many "Debbie-Digitals" in the market. I saw an old friend last week while I was waiting for Cameron to get off work at the SUU pool, when this friend asked me what I was doing there I told them that I had come back to finish my degree. He asked me how long I had left, and when I told him three years, he laughed in my face, then asked me to repeat that and laughed again. Cameron took me to Vegas for a couple of days during spring break and we had two of those time share guys stop us on the strip and try to get us to go to their presentations, when we told them we were students so we didn't meet the income requirements, they looked at me and asked how old I was, then promptly pointed out, that they weren't judging (You're 30!? I'm not judging, but really, you are still in school.) Cam and I went up north and again I had people tell me that what I was doing was worthless. Even my own Grandmother told me that I had been is school so G.D. long that I was just wasting money and never going to graduate. I understand it is unusual, especially considering the fact that I left a job to go back to school, but this was a decision that I prayed about and felt that we needed to do. There comes a point in time that I just want to start telling people to go to hell. Some times it gets really old being mocked and ridiculed for what you are doing.

Although it has been difficult to have people put down my education so much, that still doesn't compare to the whole baby thing. I have come to the conclusion that people are just stupid, that may sound harsh, but it's the only explanation I can think of for the things people say. If I hear one more time, "you don't understand cause you don't have kids" or "someday when you have kids you will understand" or "we had been trying to get pregnant for so long, like 4 months and it was really hard to not get pregnant" I am going to lose it. Just because I have not been able to carry a baby in my body and then push it out a little hole doesn't mean that I don't know anything about kids. Trust me, I work very hard to be the favorite Aunt to my sisters children, and I have been babysitting for her since Tyler (10) was a baby. And I worked with kids everyday at Photo Works and Kiddie Kandids, trust me, I am not as stupid as I look. It is just the most frustrating thing EVER. And Cam and I get this EVERYWHERE we go. I even had some one tell me once "Oh my gosh, I wish I had to adopt. Aren't you so glad you don't have to be pregnant?"

I know we are supposed to love one another and forgive people when they treat us like crap and be more Christlike, and trust me, I am trying and praying that I can do that. Right now though, I just want to scream. Sorry, I just needed to get that out.

On a happier note. Cameron and I are finally starting the adoption process! We have our first meeting with LDS family services in April and we are so excited. It has been a great blessing to have so much time with just the two of us, but we are ready to start our family.

Sorry this blog was a little negative. I just needed to get some of that stuff out. And like I said, there are only two or three of you that read this anyway. The next entries will be happier, I promise!!